Coming Soon:

Project Ideas:

• AI Companion for ages 11-99. This will be set up by parents for children under the age of 18 or with parental supervision.

• The continuing adventures of Hoodi.

In the works:

My Own Power - This book is aimed at young readers it is a East Meets West philosophy that positively uplifts our young readers while teaching them how to navigate this world. This will include personal stories, stories I have heard in lectures and read in writings from notable authors.  This book aims to bridge the gap between parents and children. Each chapter builds on the next, walking readers through the same issues I had, and didn't know how to navigate.

Preview:

This section focuses on giving with out expecting and resentments.  Images ommited.

Week 2

Anger and Gratitude

“It’s not my fault that person said/did and I need…” We all want to feel heard, to be seen for the beautiful prize we are. Our beauty doesn’t shine in times of anger. We cannot think straight, we cannot focus on the task at hand. By living in the moment we are hurt we are robbing the world of our more positive gifts. Some people have the gift of socialization, they are able to mask the pain and shove it way down so no one can see and drudge on with their day. Some, like me, are forever optimists and have been far too uneducated on the real world for our own good. Just because we see this on the outside does not mean they aren’t suffering on the inside. That isn’t good either. 

Think of a time when someone said something that made you so mad that was all you could think about for what seemed like forever. This is what is known as renting space in your head. This ties up your thinking, especially when one has a really big task to complete, like studying or homework that can make or break your grade. I equate this to being torn in two directions. You are telling your brain by rehashing the argument or situation that is what needs to be taken care of. Forcing yourself to study in this state is not only foolish but frustrating. 

Living with anger  on the inside can have long reaching effects on our minds and our health. For me, growing up wasn’t easy. For some of us language can be hard to understand and understanding what social norms are can be really hard to navigate. From school friend groups to more mature situations. This can cause confusion, stress and a lot of misdirected anger. Without expressing our feelings this can lead to inner anger and inner anger is a silent killer. This is called soda pop syndrome. 

Image: IStock

This is how it works: you are your favorite soda, the person or situation that makes you mad shakes you up but if let sit it can calm down. When you thrive on inner anger that never settles the next thing that comes and shakes you up creates more pressure on the walls of the bottle. The last issue usually results in a messy flow of all the wrongs that have happened to you. The person that is the cause of the last shake probably did something minor. Picture someone driving it could be a parent, friend or relative. Someone does something minor such as not reacting fast enough to the green light. Most people will calmly wait until the person has realized that the light has changed. Then there are the small few that honk and yell because they are already late. The calm people may have already taken into account the person who didn’t realize they may have more going on in their lives than the honkers.

Allowing negative thoughts to creep in and ignoring the good we have going in front of us. In this state we wish for things outside of us to make us better, when we already have everything we need to be capable, wonderful and amazing people. We can slowly change and alter this by changing how we look at what we have. We can start to thank our parents for their hard work even when we are having a hard day. We can compliment family members or friends randomly just to see them smile. A word of advice, we can never know what a person is going through, what wars are going on in their heads, or chaos in their lives. When someone upsets us, we don’t know if it is because of a bad day or they may not be feeling well. I urge you to act in kindness. I am not saying that awful things are excusable, nor am I saying that we need to take on the blame for abuses. What I am saying in common situations instead of reacting, try to take a few breaths and return to the conversation with a calmer attitude.

Gratitude in Action

Many years ago, my aunt invited me for a sleepover. I grew up in Montana, where there are a lot of tiny towns, many with only one small convenience store. Our towns were over two hours apart, and hers didn't have a full-size grocery store.

On the way, we stopped at a store in a neighboring town. My aunt looked at me and asked, “Do you need or want anything? This is the only time we are going to the store.” My mom never asked me this, so I didn’t know how to respond. I just looked up at my auntie, who was smiling at me.

She asked if I would like some chips—she always had the best potato chips ever. I got really excited but was afraid to make a scene, because my mom would often tell me to calm down when I showed excitement. So, I just quietly nodded my head.

When we got back to her house, I joyfully helped with the groceries. That whole time with her was amazing. With just that one trip to the store, my auntie prepared and portioned out meals for a month. For me, coming from a home where things felt chaotic, this was peace. I felt like I was helping my family eat for a whole month.

As we were cooking, my auntie taught me how she saved money and why preparation was so important. Some of the greatest lessons I’ve ever learned have come from my elders. She taught me about patience and that the best things in life are worth waiting for. But she showed me something else, too: that when we are prepared for the days to come, we are free to find the beauty in life.

That is a lesson I have never lost. That is gratitude—for what you have, for who is around you, and for the peace you can create for yourself.

My auntie taught me about preparation in more than just food, she also taught me the importance of thriving, then adapting. She also taught me that it only takes a little bit of effort, love and dedication to help have a better tomorrow. I was also able to see how a calm, prepared home created an atmosphere of peace where gratitude could grow easily, which was a sharp contrast to the chaos I was used to.Having gratitude means we are happy with what we have, we do not long for something that someone else has. The hardest part is finding joy for others that are able to have stuff we do not, or can accomplish things we cannot.

Questions For Workbook

1. In the story my auntie taught me through spending time with me, can you think of a special time that someone you love did something that was very important to you?

2. What is your favorite thing to do with different family members or friends? 

3. How can you show those individuals that you are grateful for the time you spent with them?

7 Day Journaling

In this lesson we discussed how anger and gratitude can change how we act in this world. Each day before bed sit down and think about your day. Think about how each interaction went. What emotions came up. Write about 3 things that happened. Each day write about how you can help someone with what you learned. Don’t be afraid to share what you learned with others. Who knows you may change a person from a person with soda pop syndrome to a person filled with gratitude.